Grateful and Thankful

Each Go Golf newsletter closes with same comment. “Be grateful when you play. Be thankful for the privilege and opportunity to play this amazing game. Now, go golf!”

Since this is Thanksgiving week here in the US, I wanted to take some time to explain why I finish with same words.

While I love the game of golf, there was period in my life where playing golf ceased being fun, and, yet I needed to play. The need to play wasn’t for the love of the game. It was about cashing checks in tournaments. My drive to play for a living became all consuming. Nothing else mattered. Good scores, winning tournaments and being a successful professional golfer were all that mattered. I spent every waking hour practicing, playing and thinking about golf. My day would start at 7:00am and finish when I finally fell asleep at night. Some nights sleep came by 9:00pm out of sheer exhaustion. Other nights sleep arrived in small hour-long spans which were followed by minutes or hours lying awake thinking about golf.

The self-imposed pressure slowly eroded my confidence until I struggled to even break 80. I became angry on the course. I tossed clubs. I cursed myself out. I took out my frustrations on playing partners at times. People who know me the best know I’m a laid back, go with the flow kind of guy. But I was anything but myself during this time period.

Because of my consuming desire to be a professional golfer, I lost my game, my confidence and, even worse, I lost myself.

Broken and beaten, I headed back to Pennsylvania to take an assistant club professional job. It was a bitter pill to swallow. I felt sorry for myself. My dream had ended, and I felt lost.

But working at the club, I met golfers who loved the game, who played, even in tournaments, for the joy of playing golf. One of the members struggled with the yips with his short game. He spent time working different drills trying to get rid of his yips but to no avail. Despite this, he wore a smile every time he played.

I asked him why he was happy playing even when he his scores were affected by his chipping yips.

He smiled. “Because today I’m still on the right side of the dirt.”

While he wanted to fix his yips, he was grateful to be alive and have the ability to play golf. His attitude showed in his scores. Despite his inability to hit simple pitches and chips, he maintained a 7-handicap. Even better, he was such a pleasure to play a round of golf with.

There were other members I played with who shared similar joy when playing no matter how well or poorly they played. Getting to play with and observe these golfers reminded me of things my mentor taught me. Accept the challenge returned to my mind following poor shots.

Slowly, my confidence and game started coming back. Still, too often, I allowed frustration to grow into anger. Occasionally, I helicoptered a club through the air.

It dawned on me the competitive side of me sometimes became a weakness in competition. I took rounds too seriously. I was unable to put a poor tournament round aside.

But the fun rounds with members?

They were great. I rarely shot over par. I was relaxed. I was having fun.

Gradually, I was able to calm myself into more of the relaxed type of play I experienced playing with members. I made Dick Smith Cup teams which I have written about before. I won a couple of tournaments.

But even with some success, the tournament rounds never felt like they were fun. I struggled to enjoy them even when I found success.

I walked away from tournament golf.

I haven’t played any serious competitive golf for nearly 30 years.

Over the years, I rediscovered my joy in playing golf. It is fun again. Do I still want to get better? Absolutely. But, if I have a bad round, I shrug it off because I am grateful I played a round and thankful for the privilege and opportunity to play. I’m grateful to just be on the course enjoying the beauty and challenge it presents. I’m thankful for the privilege to play because it is a privilege to play golf. There are people in this world who will never play a round of golf because they do not have access to the game. I’m also thankful for the opportunity because none of us know when it might be the last time teeing it up.

There is another defining moment which reflects my gratefulness and thankfulness. To find out the rest of the story, consider upgrading to a paid subscription. Paid subscribers receive access to additional content each week.

As always, be grateful when you play. Be thankful for the privilege and opportunity to play this amazing game.

For my quest to get to 110 mph, I focused exclusively on weight training this week due to the medical tests I undertook this week. Good news. I am getting stronger.

Following Thanksgiving week, I have some additional tests to undergo, but I am planning on going full bore into my training as the off-season has arrived.

One final note. There will not be a newsletter next week due to Thanksgiving.